Saturday, March 27, 2010

Where is the Mommy Motivation?

I realized today that my issues isn't as much a lack of time as a lack of motivation. I have a 5 mile long to-do list with household chores, baby stuff, school stuff, etc. but I never seem to accomplish anything anymore. Today I realized that I waste a huge amount of time doing nothing. That's right, literally nothing! My husband entertained the baby today and I took an almost 3 hour nap and then when I got up I fed the baby lunch and then did nothing. Well, by nothing I mean I sat in the floor playing with the baby. I had plenty of opportunities to knock out my to-do list but I just couldn't talk myself into getting started on anything. I find myself in this same situation every weekend. Where is my mommy motivation? Monday through Wednesday I am so busy that I literally meet my husband coming and going. As soon as he gets in from work I head out to school then I get home and head straight down the hall to put the baby to bed, then I meet him heading to bed. Thursday is always wasted trying to rest up from the three previous days. You would think Friday-Sunday I could work up some energy and get some things done! Avin still doesn't sleep through the night so I find myself getting up multiple times in the night with him. Although his awake time is short it is still exhausting to constantly get up and down. I feel like motherhood is lived in 2 hour intervals. You get up in the morning, get the baby breakfast, play, within 2 hours you put him down for nap, within 2 hours he gets up, plays, you feed him lunch, the he plays, within 2 hours he's ready for nap, he gets up, plays, within 2 hours you feed him dinner, he plays, then whoa- within 3 hours it's bedtime, you put him down and then get up every 2-3 hours to feed. I find myself dragging, accomplishing less and less, looking and acting like a zombie. I need to find some mommy motivation!!! So, ladies, please, if you have the secret to Mommy Motivation please do not hesitate to leave me a comment and share. All tips on coping with sleep deprivation, actually having a clean house, a sleeping baby, and completed homework are welcome!


Anonymous said...

My conclusion to a clean house........ Stop cleaning up after everyone and eventually the house will be trashed they'll have no clean clothes have to wash dishes in order to eat, make their own coffee and food!! I am so tierd of doing everything!! Is it really hard to pick up after yourself????? Never mind listening????????? I think I am going to loose my voice for repeating myself so much!
I really don't know if I should snap or cry right now!

Heidi Maxwell said...

I don't know about motivation, but I'll tell you how I (barely) manage day to day.

When O (2 yrs 9 mths) wakes up in the morning, I get up. I change baby R (9 mths) or grab the fixings for her morning change and head into O's room. R get's changed first, either way. Then I get O changed. Then we head out to the kitchen and I fix O breakfast and give R something to nibble on as well. While they are eating I can feed the dog, get myself some coffee and a bite to eat, put the dishes away, start a load of laundry, and maybe even make my bed and get dressed. The key in the morning is to not give into wanting to just sit down and do nothing. Once I give in, not much gets accomplished.

After breakfast and once my bed is made and I am dressed we are ready to head out for the day. Monday is playgroup, Tuesday library and yoga, Wednesday shopping, Thursday and Friday park or bouncy house or museum or maybe even just stay home and play or do crafts.

Then lunch. While they eat I can eat and maybe get a chore done. Dishes or more laundry. Cleaning up the toys and junk from the morning if there are any. Putting away groceries.

When O goes in for down time (she doesn't always sleep, but she still has quiet time in her room), I feed R and she usually sleeps on my lap while use the computer to check email, pay bills, blog, Facebook, play games, or whatever. I try to be productive online, but that's not always the case. Yesterday I designed business logos. Today I made a digital collage of photos for my mother in law.

Then they are both up again. Playing, crafts, going for a walk, running another errand are all things that can happen in the afternoon. By 4:30 or so I have to be either prepping or cooking dinner. We used to eat by 6, but now I try and have dinner ready by 5:30.

Toys away again and then Dad gives O a bath and stories while I clean up dinner and do the dishes. I get R ready for bed. Then dad and I can sit down and relax until bedtime. We watch TV or a movie, usually. R nurses and usually falls asleep on my lap. I can use the computer again while we are chilling to either waste time or maybe get some work done.

I aim to get the major things done: feed the family, dishes, laundry, and straightening up on a daily basis. Bigger things like shopping, errands, cleaning of floors and bathrooms, yardwork, projects get done as I get time. I aim to get one big thing done every other day at least. Some weeks I get a ton done, others not so much. I also tend to 'clean as I go' so nothing ever gets totally insanely messy. Well, except the garage - which turns into a pit of doom every winter. Cleaning the garage is one of dad's big spring projects. And it's scheduled for tomorrow, actually!

But don't count sitting down and playing with or reading to your kiddos as doing nothing. That's quality time with mom and it is invaluable!

As for sleep: it will get better. I still end up getting up with 1 or 2 times a week and she's almost 3. Rowan is up every 3 hours or so. I bring her in bed with me at night and that helps me get some sleep. Or rest, rather. Most of the time it isn't possible to sleep when she sleeps during the day, but every once in a while I will nap with her while O is in for her down time. Getting exercise, drinking a lot of water, avoiding soda and extra sugar, and taking my vitamins helps a lot. it helps me sleep better at night and helps me feel better and more energized (even when I feel like I have none) during the day.

Oh - and some days I even get to do a mommy craft like sewing or knitting. It's something I aim to do a few minutes of every day. Doesn't always happen, but it's always on my list!!

Avin's Momma said...

Holy cow Heidi! I am so tired just from reading your post! Way to go Momma! Thanks for sharing your routine.

Julie said...

Hang in there. I am in the same boat. So much to do and so little time. But the thing I realize is that when it all builds up then I feel overwhelmed and when I do have time I don't no where to begin so instead of picking something and doing it I decide to sit on the computer and read blogs or do Facebook...But when I keep on top of certain things they seem easier to maintain. I can hardly make myself nap when given the chance but when I do it's bliss.

Anyhow, you're not alone. ;)